Dear Mom.......... pain

Dear Mom.....  damn I'm in so much pain lately.  I'm still waiting (after about 5mths) for that back surgeon from Mt Sinai to call with an appt.  And this dislocation is going to be the death of me yet.  Healed in 6 weeks my ass.  How the hell did they come up with that stupid #.   I'm so tired, I'm up half the night just trying to find a position that doesn't hurt so much that I can get some sleep.  I'm very tired of it.  In the middle of the night I was thinking that I wished I could just go to bed and die in my sleep and get this all over with.  No one deserves this much pain all this time.